Art journal ramblings

I feel like I'm having a journal mid-life crisis... minus the mid-life! I don't know.. it seems I'm still searching for what feels "right." I see so many different journals online that I'm inspired by, so many different prompts, things to include in a journal, my head spins thinking about it all. It's like I want to do it all and I don't know what to do first! I think that a journal "style" is a reflection of what you are inspired by at the time and it is ok to change it up and also try new things in your journal too. I feel like I want to go in a bit of a different direction with my journaling and see where it takes me. I know for sure that I want to include much more handwriting on my pages. I have recently just become so interested in my own handwriting and the way it looks, simple but truly me, telling events that have happened or ideas in my head. I think that is what I want more of.

Now, I have developed a journal style that I do love and feel is very me.. lots of collage and very raw and random. But sometimes it feels like I'm struggling and I am not really into it. I like to be spontaneous, but when I want to include some writing, many times I will pick up the pen and not know what to say. I think I need to have something to focus on. What I really want to do is more of a daily journal, I think. Journals where I can document and record: write the days events, include tidbits to collage , doodle and whatnot. I have always been a writer at heart and lost some of that when I started to art journal, I think subconsciously I've told myself that I don't need to write or shouldn't really write because it's a visual journal, which of course isn't true at all but I can be hard on myself. I think daily visual journaling will help me feel more comfortable with writing and give me a little structure which I feel like I need right now. This is not to say I will stop the types of pages I normally do, but I'm going to try this out too.

Also - the moleskine sketchbook is killing me. Not the sketchbook project, but the regular moleskine book that I have. We all know the paper is amazing- but for some reason it's intimidating me like crazy. Some little voice in my head keeps telling me the pages I've done aren't good enough because they are in THAT book. It's hard to shut up that little voice! I really do love the moleskine for making nice paper that us artists love..but I don't think I'm a moleskine girl anymore.. I want a 99 cent journal that I can let loose in that won't scare me to death. Just how I'm feeling right now! The sketchbook project is not even as intimidating (I know, weird)... that thin little cahier notebook has got nothing on me... its that big bad black sketchbook! haha.

Well.. there wasn't a real point to this post, just to let my feelings out and ramble. I hope this wasn't too negative, I just needed to get my thoughts down. Maybe you can relate? :)